The tiny digital clock read 5:15 a.m. She was lying on the bed still half asleep. She hugged the pillow next to her imagining it to be her husband. She longed it really was her husband and not merely a pillow. But he was gone forever. It was already a month after the tragedy. She was not convinced yet that it was all for real. The untimely death of her husband still seemed like a bad dream.
She couldn't sleep. She woke up and prepared 2 cups of coffee as usual. One for her and one for her dead husband. She almost forgot that he wasn't there. Wiping her tears, realizing that he is no more, she placed the extra cup of coffee in front of her husband's photo, not knowing what else to do.
Some days she would cook extra food for her dead husband. She would sometimes order two meals at the take-away counter without realizing that she now needs only one. During weekends, she would forget to cook, because it was he who always cooked on Saturdays. At times, she would keep the door wide open at dusk, expecting her husband would return from work as always. At every step, she almost made everything for her non-existent husband. Accepting the death of her husband had become impossible for her. She had almost lost her mind. She wished that her non-existent husband would come back to life. She wanted him to exist. She could feel the pain in her throat, in her chest. Her heart ached. She wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, but she was unable to do so. Her hands became stiff, she couldn't move.
Suddenly she woke up, unable to breathe. She had a hot flush. She could hear her husband snoring lightly next to her. It was a nightmare, she consoled herself. She saw the clock. It was 5:15 a.m, just like in her dream. She got off the bed and came to the balcony to get some fresh air. Suddenly, she could relate to everything. She clearly got the meaning of it.
. . . .
The couple had an argument 2 days back over a silly matter, and that was enough for them to stop talking to each other. They did not exchange smiles, no chit-chats, nothing. No "Good Morning", no "hi", no "bye". She almost treated him like he did not exist, and so did he. In the morning, she would prepare breakfast for herself and ignore him altogether. He would leave to office without a word. In the evening, she would sip her coffee all by herself. At night, though it was his task to make the bed, he would just clean his portion, leaving all the mess on her side.
She wanted him to become non-existent. Even if he was right in front of her... she acted like he wasn't there. She ignored him. She gave him a deaf ear. She did all her daily routines like he doesn't even exist.
As a matter of fact, just the opposite happened in her dream. He was dead in her dream, She wanted him to come to life. She did her daily routine like he existed, right beside her. She yearned that he once again came to life.
She felt very sorry for what was happening. She realized that they did not cherish their relationship enough. When in anger, she always thought that he did not exist. And in her dreams, she wanted her dead husband to still exist.
"Better ignore his mistakes, than to ignore him... altogether" she thought and went back to bed, gently squeezed his nose so that he stop snoring, hugged him lightly and felt warm when he hugged her back. It was as easy as that.
"Better ignore his mistakes, than to ignore him... altogether" she thought and went back to bed, gently squeezed his nose so that he stop snoring, hugged him lightly and felt warm when he hugged her back. It was as easy as that.
Through her dream, she learnt a lesson for life. Cherish the ones you have in your life, because you never know when they won't be around anymore.
